prose

There is a feeling of fear that sneaks up, when I get emails from someone who wants to create pain and suffering for me...because they are in pain.....cause they feel something is unfair, i shouldn't get more than i deserve, and what is that? what value is put on my womb, on six 6 sections, on the caring for the children, on 20 years of my life.....

And its not 'actually' happening now,there is nothing happening now, but someone elses pain and grief
and I know legalistically I didn't have anything before and my life is perfect this 
moment, so have faith it will all work out.

So what am I worried about. ? Its all he's got on me to turn me away from who I 
am, which is love....

Because I turn from love when I take into my heart another human being out there 
that seems or projects wanting to persecute me, his offspring, for his pain...

And it has just got to be washed away in Christ.....

lord show me the way,